Saturday, 26 March 2011


I've added some links you bastards. Some of the authors are Leeds fans which is a bit unfortunate. The fucking Merrion Centre white shite Hull City wannabes. Now here's an interesting bit of football trivia for you, Ellend Road is the only ground in the country that is spelt with a silent 'B'. They're all just overspill from City really. How about a City / Leeds Wembley play-off final, with the Tigers just nicking it 5-1? Don't worry, City just aren't good enough this year really, I know that. Leeds sing a truely appalling song that shows their true mentality. It goes 'champions of England.....champions of Europe...' whilst spinning their scarves in a 70s stylee. The 'champions of Europe' bit relates to the European Cup Final from the seventies when they got BEAT (get it, Leeds?), yes, BEAT by Munchen I think it was. Now how the fuck that makes them champions of fucking Europe I'll never know. They say that they were denied a penalty or summat. For fuck's sake. Do you think Bayern sing 'champions of Europe' about the 99 final when they were robbed by the Mancs bastards? Don't think so. The Mancs? Don't even get me started on them bastards, I hate them more than I hate Leeds. Much more in fact.

So, how are you all? Good? Oh I'm fine thanks. Thanks for asking though. When reading one of the posts from one the new links, it reminded me of something that happened last year at the Wheldrake American Widge. As I walked towards the hide a bloke passed me going back to the car. 'Any good for the American?' said I. 'Not sure yet. I'm just going home now to look through my photos to see if I've seen it' said he. What? So what he's done is taken a super zoom photo sweep of all the wildfowl then toddled off home to zoom into them and ID the birds at his leisure! Makes a new meaning of the phrase 'Armchair Tick' doesn't it? Utter shite birding skills you stupid twat. I hope you're reading this.

Fuck me, I having a right rant today aren't I? Ha ha ha.

But hey, Spring's here, migration underway, England play the leeks today, it's Ollie's 40th, so we're all up town. Reasons to be cheerful. Part three. England also play Sri Lanka in the Cricket World Cup. The CWC has lasted somewhere close to 4 years. In fact I think they start playing the next one straight after this one. The day after the final.....right lads we've got a big group game tomorrow in the 2015 CWC against Zimbabwe.......

Said Strausso.


Friday, 25 March 2011

East Park Hull

With Nicola working all day both children were with me for the day. A jaunt to East Park was implemented. Perambulator, bottles of drink, diapers, bins and baby wipes were loaded onto carriage, carriage laden with diesel fuel, carriage pointed Eastwards, carriage driven. On arrival it was packed. Bastard packed in fact. I was expecting a Chiff or two singing but the gathering of smackheeds Burbed-up to fuck with chav-encrusted earrings down to their shoulders soon put a stop to any hope of that.

I like doing new paragraphs now, It's easy.

I should've known how to do it in the first place.

Slide fun was followed by Pirate ship fun which, in turn preceded swing fun, after this came climbing frame fun which was abruptly ended by Mega Tufted Duck and icecream fun.

There I go again. East Park is fairly regularly watched, more so in Winter months I believe due to lack of Chav action and increase in Wildfowl / possibility of decent inland bird action. Today's highlight was (I know I usually add something made-up like a pile of horse shit or a trainer or something like that, but this bit really is true, this really did happen) something on the lake that had it's tail lifted, almost like a Ruddy Duck! Jesus! It IS a Ruddy Duck, surely? On optically-aided inspection, the 2-litre Lilt bottle drifted 'round so that the sun shone through it revealing it's green sheen on the mantle, tertials and primary coverts, a 'Lilt' logo across it's breast complete with copyright symbol, and totally tropical taste.

I'm off now to take a patio out, put down 120 bricks in it's place then a new window above, create a stoothing wall on the inside, board it, skim it and finish with uPVC windowboard, clean and seal.


Tuesday, 22 March 2011


Well I never. A White-spot Bluethroat at Spurn. Hardly mega news. But it is mega news. It's not mega news from a national outlook, no way Jose, but from the observatory's outlook this is the first record of this form for some 55 years! Local Mega! Local Mega sub-species actually. Not here today though, no way. In fact all that was here today were some Meadow Pipits, a Goldeneye, some Skylarks, a dead trainer on the beach looked like an Adidas, 5 Cockerels, loads of old blokes in waxed jackets, a Hercules flying about, two disgusting toads that were doing disgusting things to each other right out in the open for all to see the disgusting perverts, and two cheshire cheese sandwiches in baps that I'd made and took along with me. I am now incredibly ashamed of my actions. Why the fuck did I take pre-made sandwiches with me? What was I thinking? Have I turned into a packed lunch / flask of tea / 'ooh look it's a lovely Reed Bunting' brigade? Fuck me, I won't be doing that again. I'll carry on with the fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants style of birding that I'm used to where making sure I've got enough petrol, roadmaps, and pre-made sandwiches are definite no-nos. It is ironic that fish are now eating raw Japanese though.

Friday, 4 March 2011

Word up, honkies. After being inundated with messages (none) to update my blog from my readers (two), well here I am! So where have I been? The family hibernated in early December, the kids were wrapped in dead bracken, put in shoe boxes and put in the gas cupboard. Of course not. I've been watching re-runs of The Fall Guy with Lee Majors all day every day. Not actually WITH Lee Majors, I simply meant that he's in the programme but I suppose watching the Fall Guy actually with Lee Majors would be pretty cool in itself. A bit like watching Starsky and Hutch with Paul Michael Glazer or The Professionals with Lewis Collins on the single chair having a beer. Lee Majors is my favourite actor. Well, after Clint Eastwood and Tim Brooke-Taylor of course. And how come there's no swearing in The Professionals? I've just watched an episode where Cowley says 'goolies' instead of 'hairy bollocks'. He says to some new CI5 recruits 'Kick them in the goolies before they do it to you'. Goolies? Fuck off. No bloke says that to another bloke, especially policemen. A real man would've said 'kick them in the hairy bollocks' without a doubt. Bodie and Doyle don't even swear. They drive around in their Capri hunting international terrorists and are shot at at least 6 times each every episode and never ever shout 'Fuck off' or 'Cocks' when they return fire which is definately what I'd shout if I were firing my gun. I can't suss out how to go to a new paragraph. My computer's down so I'm on mobile. Anyway, imagine a new paragraph: Isn't this meant to be a birdy blog? Yes. Yes it is. I went to Allerthorpe last Friday for the Coues's to no avail. I had a candidate in the fields behind where people watching but no real chance of nailing it at that range. Did you have a nice Christmas? Oh, quiet, you know. When my PC is up and running I'll post you a video of the beginning of the Professionals and describe how brilliant it still is after all these years. Does anybody have a clue what I'm talking about? No, me neither. Been some rare fucking things around hasn't there? I haven't seen them though.