Monday, 12 March 2012

Man U rant

All you Mancs bastards will be excited about Sky's proposed new channel. It's a general sports channel but will make references to Manchester United as much as possible, even when the story is not really related. Plus, in their live football coverage, Gary Neville (son of Neville Neville) will now be a pundit AND commentator on EVERY game just so they can ask him for a Man U anecdote and talk a bit more about Man U even during Norwich vs Wigan. This new channel is to be called Sky Sports News and will be broadcast on channel 405...oh...hang on...

I've got man flu. Man flu is a term invented by women because they think that men can't handle illness and always exaggerate just how bad it is. Well, both girls had a bug this week which they shook off quite well but then I started with similar symptoms, aching legs, sickness, man flu, and really aching fucking legs. This only meant one thing. Polio. Had to be. Just had to be. Therefore the above Man U rant can be excused as I have polio and, ergo, I'm not happy.

Back to Man U. The media big them up big time. It's their personal propaganda machine. They really do bring Man U into any story they can. Cunts. Man U are bigger cunts. Yesterday across the bottom of the screen came "Athletico Bilbao lose 2-1 ahead of their game with Man U". Big news! But at least a chance to bring Man U into it.
Let's look in the paper, I'll find something... I will....

...right, found one. It's easy. Swansea 1 Man City 0 write up in the Sun. What's the headline? Surely something about a great win for Swansea? Or the really very good football they've played since they've come up? What about the way they still try to play football even against the big sides? Or the excellent job that Rodgers is doing there? No. None of that. It reads:

"Luke who's a hero for United"

with reference to Luke Moore who scored the winner.

To illustrate Man U propaganda I give you this. Beckham was voted runner up in the World Player of the Year in 99. All the Mancs sucked each other off and shouted about King Becks being the second best player on the planet. I asked a few of them, "so who's the best player at Man U?"
"Erm...probably Giggs....or Scholes".
"Who after that?"
"Schmeichel. Then Stam then probably Beckham".

So Beckham is around the fifth or sixth best at Man U but he's the second best in the world?

Upside down Ollie is laughing right now cos he knows what I'm like with Man U. I think I can rest my case.

Rant over. Back to being poorly.

"But have you anything to tell us about birds or birding? Anything at all" shouts the frustrated audience reading a supposed birding blog.

No. Not a thing.


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